Day 10 of the #loveme challenge…Share a secret

lovemechallenge

Today I am suppose to share a secret…I have 2 instincts on this. I want to say I am an open book and if you ask I will tell you if I have not already. Then my second is if I tell you, then it’s not a secret anymore, LOL. I have come to learn that I do not really have any secrets just ones that certain people do not know. For example, many people may know one aspect about me but some others may not. So in actuality its not a secret, just little know information, or not public information. SO I guess I may impart some of that little known information with you all. I was raped at 18 by a gang of guys in a fraternity while with a person I considered a friend and trusted for years. She disappeared to a private place at the party with her guy/date and as the party wound down I she was my ride and I was away from home on spring break with her nearly 100 miles from home. Everyone left except 4 guys. I was pretty nervous and scared! I refused to play along and scream whatever stupid frat saying they told me to and they thought it was brave “a soldier” they kept saying. They tried to break me. One guy refused to do anything and and told them to stop and finally saved me and took me to his room in the house and locked the door! He wouldn’t let anyone in the room til the next morning kicking everyone else out the house. I actually wanted to see him again for the rest of the weekend. He was a breath of fresh air as I was still stuck with the ‘trusted friend’ who had no idea what had happened and to this day thinks that all that was fun for me that night! I felt abandoned and hurt! I felt like I owed the man my life. He and I talked all night. He had my number and we talked for few days after that. But eventually we lost contact which was for the better because I needed to find myself and that took a long time for me to do! Unfortunately, looking back this set in motion a crazy summer for me that I could never have foreseen!!! But my ex-fiancee did even without knowing these details. I have forgiven her through prayer but I have actually not had any dealing with her in years because the opportunity has not come about.

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7 comments

  1. Lynz Real Cooking · September 19, 2015

    Wow that is so sad and awful. I hope you have healed!! So sorry you went through this!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Lady CAS · September 19, 2015

      I have it took a long time to get through it and it was hard to comes to terms with it because I felt that I encouraged it because I had no other choice. I felt I put myself in that situation in a since that I was a consenting ‘adult’ since I was 18 even though I really did not want to do it. I was more afraid of what would happen if I said no and how much worse it could have been.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Lynz Real Cooking · September 19, 2015

        so sorry!

        Liked by 1 person

        • Lady CAS · September 19, 2015

          Thank you, my life is luckily a very resilient one! I am Thankful for good friends, family, and their support to keep me on track in and somehow they have always made sure even when I was unsure that I did not lose faith in what I believed in.

          Liked by 1 person

  2. Alyson · September 20, 2015

    Heya! I’m on the lookout for Anime & Manga writers which lead me to your blog. I could not find your email address, could you please shoot me an email: alysonburston[at]live.com — It’s regarding writing about Anime type of offer. This is not spam by the way. Thanks!

    Liked by 1 person

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