When asked if I was drunk I simply say it depends! And when people say you are not stupid you know what I am asking I simply state back no I do not! I could be implying many things and I prefer you be straight forward.
To me it depends on what you are accusing me of having drank, LOL. I could have overindulged in the very best water, juice (non-fermented), or simply LOVE DRUNK!
I even enjoy virgin daiquiris and virgin pina coladas. So to ask me if I am drunk by insinuating that I may have had too much to drink, well my bell may be sloshing with lots of liquids and I may indeed need to use the ladies facilities soon, but to insinuate that I am under the influence of alcohol merely because I am a silly person giggling is unfair. I do this without thinking because I am very cheery person. As you can infer, I am a silly prankster/ comedian of sorts!
HOWEVER; to follow me as a cop from a restaurant because you saw me order what you thought was a drink, saw me have some good laughs with a friend, and climb into a car behind the wheel, I know you felt you were doing your job…. I thank you for this! I wish there were more like you who did this check. However, next time, since you not on duty, (and I offered) please, just check my bill as it says non-alcoholic beside the drink, LOL. This way we no one feels silly later or time is not wasted.