CELEBRATE LIFE-Negative People

Understand life is your gift! There are too many things to be grateful about to allow negative people to descend upon your life like vultures. There are many types of negative people and sometimes we are not always aware of the negative people who are sucking the life out of us so let me enlighten you! It’s about to get real:

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THE WHINERS

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These are the ones who were probably sheltered most of their lives and/ or given everything they wanted as soon as they began to whine to suffice them so they continued the behavior well into adulthood. They unfortunate thing is that they literally whine about EVERYTHING. From their everyday life to every thing they see and everything that happens around them while you are with them even when it is a fun engagement and everyone else is having fun! They can down right throw a temper tantrum  because they are not getting their way.

THE CYNIC

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This person is so jaded and use to being let down by life that they try to beat every good moment/ person with the seeing the bad side first. They always play the devil’s advocate and see the ‘rusted’ lining instead of the silver lining. The tend to come off more sarcastic and will even try to pass things off as jokes. However, after a while you learn this person needs to adjust their views and let go of the past that has let them down so many times and focus on the good things that have happened.

 

THE RUDE/ JEALOUS ONE

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These people are typically just flat out blunt about life and sometimes out right mean. They can (not always) seek to attack others because they are underdogs and want to attack them like bullies to make themselves feel better. You may not even realize it because they pick on you but as soon as other’s pick on you they stick up for you, with the premise, “only they can pick on you-and I’ll kick you arse if you try cus that’s my friend”. Yes sometimes friends have a few laughs at our expense, but a ‘friend’ who ALWAYS brings up your bad moments, is there when you are down to show you how good they are doing, and only helps you if they can get something out of it is likely jealous of you. Sometimes the rudeness is a front for how they really feel about you! Sometimes it is because they are just mean people who like to assert their power!

THE COMPLAINER

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This person is the one who is most negative. They are like the whiners but they are different in that their negativity is not solely personal. They complain about what happens in every situation. They complain about the good things, the bad things, the situation, they are in, and the ones they could be in. It is funny how they even beg for something to happen and when it happens and it really is a good thing, they still complain. They are just ungrateful all the time. This can be brought on from a few things including learned helplessness and from long stents of depression.

GOSSIPERS/ INSTIGATORS

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This one does the most damage for all those involved because it is both preventable and can be stopped with the person doing it and you (the person listening). These people can destroy a person’s character and not always intentionally but more out of something to talk about or say. When it’s intentional it is even worse and can have devastating effects. Throwing ‘shade’ is another way to say instigating a dispute so be careful of these new terms that you want to bandwagon on and feel relevant, cool, or popular because eventually you will be labeled at THAT ONE and if you are okay with that so be it but if not CHANGE IT.

THE REMEDY

Surround yourself with positive people. Talk with a therapist. If you are the positive person and there are negative people in your circle try to be patient with the negative people (at first) and tell them about their behavior. If they do not start to make changes then you have to let them go (remember this will not happen over night so be patient if they really mean that much to you). They have to begin with acknowledgment, acceptance, and positive self-talk!

However, patience does not mean to be blind or sacrifice your own well-being. If the person is not changing you have to cut them so you can continue to flourish. Even if it is your family, you can love them from a distance. It doesn’t mean you have to be disrespectful, you can still speak and show love but you do not have to actively hang with them. Again just focus on enjoying life.

Now I will say this, I keep the occasional cynic in my group and I like a person who knows how to play the devil’s advocate in analytical thinking, but not be a constant negative thinker. It is good to have those who possess these attributes at times but not ALL the time. So be mindful and be careful of those who are sucking the positive energy out of you.

I just cannot keep caring about all this negative stuff and I must be free! It’s almost Friday and I have checked out!

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When It All Comes Together

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There are times when things just seem to fall into place like the perfect puzzle. I mean they seem to start to fall into place no matter how hard they did not want to before. I was in so much stress just a few months back and struggling mentally with some things before and now. I have decided that whether these things truly come to pass or not I have plan and a back up plan and that I am fine with either. I am going to be content with these plans and keep pushing forward.

I am trying to be upbeat because it is pretty much all I know how to be! I mean I know I am not perfect and so does everyone around me and I can live with that. I enjoy the feeling I get when I know that my hard work pays off and that when you put out your good intentions and vibes in the world they do come back in the same way. I may not do everything I want to but I know that I have a really good heart and I try to think of others often.

I pray for others often and they may never know it but, they are constantly on my mind because I want to see them do well even if I forget to call, text, or facebook them once every 3 months, LOL. Sometimes it can be hard for me to talk to people who are constantly more negative than positive because it drains me and when there are a lot of them and they do not listen to advice or perpetuate more negativity I have to distance myself a bit so that it does not sour my mood. I only want to uplift people and some people can make that really hard.

If I could tattoo a smiley face on everyone’s heart and make it rain hearts and flowers I would. But since  I can’t will have to go with my method of loving people in the only ways I know how and that is to uplift them when I can, love them no matter what, and do what I can, when I can! This also includes helping the random stranger at the library adjust her paragraph formatting to reduce the spacing as she as not as familiar with computers.

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And letting my 1-3 drivers in at certain locations along my route home in traffic. I love doing my good deeds. I also enjoy helping the odd person read something or find something in the store that they may be looking for though I totally do not work there.

So when good things happen to me I am still surprised, not because I feel like I deserve them but because I feel like my one little good deed could not have possibly warranted such an amazing blessing sometimes. I am always so grateful.

I said GOOD DAY!

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Now when I say good day I usually mean it as a joke. Today I meant it as a statement. I felt it was radiating from me like the day rushed up to meet me and said, “hello, how are you?” and in response I was cordial and and said, ” actually I feel pretty good and I’m going to claim this day to be good and so it shall be and it is SO!” I felt like a Queen making a royal proclamation.

I woke up fairly rested. I had a pretty good night the night before. Watched a great movie. Then watched the live NBC version of the WIZ and it was really great. Then I read my book for a while all while cooking my lunch and dinner for today in the crockpot. Then I settled in and went to bed.

So this morning was pretty good. I got up read so more. took my time getting up and made some breakfast. Put my lunch together. Then my dinner as I would be at work for that time as well. Then I read again. I got up got ready for work and still had plenty of time before work. So I prayed a bit. Then I read some more. I felt really good this morning. I got up packed my stuff and prayed as I always do as I leave my house (a short prayer of protection and then added one for my family and friends and their relationships today as I felt especially good).

I got to work early 20 minutes early so I read for 10 minutes. Then I went in. I got my things together. Set up and boss let me soak in my normal 5 minutes of (meditation) and then he hit me with bad news. We have been getting a lot of that lately…I was like HEY…I SAID GOOD DAY. But then the news he gave about the person…it was a blessing in disguise because at least they were strong and fighting! My special person my “sunflower” is in my prayers and I despite my initial shock I know today will be a good day and the sun shines bright with new hope for them. I cannot go deeper than that for now but just know you are not alone! I say GOOD DAY! SO it must be!