I cannot believe it has been a week since I have blogged! This is so unlike me. I mean it is like me going a day without talking! It just so rarely happens you would think that I am sick. The reality is that I have been so busy that I have hardly had time to wrap my head around all the strange feelings and activities that I have been undergoing.
Let’s first talk about these activities. I have been visiting friends and family like it is going out of style in an effort to seemingly catch up on all the years I have missed from being away in college or busy with my masters for so many years. I also am trying to catch up from being ill and unable to visit and hang with people as my reason was I was in the hospital or to weak to actually be away from home or treatment more than about 1-2 hours if that.
Now that I can I have been booked or booking so much time with family and friends that I have turned ‘fun’ into another job form myself and have to slow down a bit. I feel like my bed and I need a real come to Jesus moment where we talk about some secret things that no one else understands. I mean it seems like it has been awhile since I have held the sandman hostage; which is a requirement when you have work shift disorder for over 15 years.
I have been kayaking, hanging in arcades (Dave and Busters), out drinking, playing pool, at food truck rodeos, and so much more. It has been fun but I have to make sure I don’t overdo things by spreading myself too thin in the name of fun.
Now for the crazy feelings, well I assume they are a mix of stress and just a bevy of emotion that keeps flooding me thinking about my future and reflecting on my past with MG. I mean to think I am almost at 15 weeks with no treatment is amazing and the longest I have gone ever. Then to think that when I first started with MG that I could barely hold or balance things in one hand and now I can hold them with a finger or two and I am almost back to my old strength even if not my old endurance yet as I have to build that back up. I also think about the fact that no matter where my husband and I are now in our relationship he was very supportive of me through some rough times that most people did not see or even know about. He may joke with me about it now but he was there and helped me get through it when I could only had him and my mom to share those really personal things with. I was even too embarrassed to tell my best friends back then. I am so happy for the stability and the success that has occurred in my life. I thank God daily and several times a day for all that is occurring in my life. People need to know that I may not be the most religious person but I am spiritual, grateful, and I love God even though I do not blog about Him all the time. I’m not here to sell you my God! He is yours if you want him and I feel if you like what I have and what I do you will seek him the same as I did because you see him working in my life as I saw him working in the lives of those who were happy around me!
Sometimes I even feel sad because I feel as though I am still not where I want to be, but I realize that I will get there in due time. I am progressing and that is all that matters. I know that I have put on weight again but I am healthy and stable and now since I can workout again I can get that weight back off. So that makes me happy and working out lately has been a great joy. My WOD (workout of the day) is going to be awesome today! I can’t hardly wait to get home and conquer it, who knows I may even let my husband do the workout with me if he doesn’t get in the way. I’m kind of selfish with my workouts, LMBO. I like to workout on my own then I will teach people whatever, they want on their own time (since he doesn’t already know the moves).